Man Claims Physical Stature Limits Ability on Drunk Test

Plenty of reasons drunk drivers give for not being able to perform the standard walk and turn sobriety test.  You got your hip replacement excuse.  The ol’ football injury relic.  Every now and then police will hear some tale about inner ear imbalance, poorly fitting shoes, uneven gait.  But a drunk driver this weekend in La Crosse topped them all.  35 year-old guy.  Plenty drunk, according to police.  Blew a .21.  But really struggled on the walk and turn.  Because, as the fellow explained while he adjusted himself, his testicles were simply “way too big” to do the test properly.  Enough so that he had to adopt a “wide stance” to complete the test.  Apparently failed that one, too.